Phone sex isn’t just something long-distance couples do, and it’s not simply a pandemic-related necessity. It can enhance passion in any relationship. But beyond that, it can improve sexual wellness and your satisfaction. So, let’s talk about why phone sex is integral to cultivating sexual wellness.
Sexual Health: What It Is
In health class, most of us received a very truncated education about sexual wellness. People who got more information than how to use a condom, how to prevent pregnancy, and visuals of the scariest STIs at the time are very lucky, indeed. In fact, only a fraction of states require any sex education, and fewer still mandate that the education be medically accurate. Unfortunately, this kind of education doesn’t give a complete picture of what it takes to be a sexually healthy adult. Instead, it creates fear and shame around sexual desires, including safe, consensual, and healthy inclinations.
What most sex ed classes leave out is that sex is a natural and healthy part of life. There is a lack of information on how sex and relationships go together, and how even in casual situations, it’s imperative that you show your partner respect and care. They also don’t talk about how sex is a part of life that requires maintenance and that long-term sexual satisfaction can’t be maintained without intentionality and effort.
The World Health Organization characterizes sexual health as a positive, pleasurable, and safe approach to sexuality—and not simply the absence of STIs or unwanted pregnancy. As adults, we often don’t prioritize sexual wellness as much as is necessary. Yet, there’s an easy way to fix that.
Why Phone Sex Is Excellent for Sexual Wellness
Psychologists often offer tips to foster sexual wellness by scheduling sex and creating desire rather than waiting for it to appear spontaneously. Others recommend finding out what you enjoy. This can seem like a tall order, but phone sex combines all of these elements of sexual wellness.
Phone sex, whether you have it with a partner or a stranger, forces you to incorporate sex into your schedule. You have to ensure you have time alone where you won’t be disturbed before getting started. By putting sex on your calendar, you make sex a priority and build anticipation of the upcoming fun.
Next, sex therapists recommend creating desire rather than waiting for it to come to you. However, this often feels vague and unrealistic. If we could just manifest arousal, no one would ever suffer from low desire or mismatched desire in relationships. Phone sex can help on this front, too. Phone sex engages different senses than you typically use, blindfolding you in a way since you can’t see your partner. You rely on your sense of hearing and imagination and changing the way you experience sex can help boost desire exponentially.
Lastly, finding out what you enjoy sexually is a significant component of sexual satisfaction and wellness. It seems obvious, but it’s not. We live in a culture where we are told that we can only enjoy certain things and what we are interested in must be socially approved. And yet, sexually taboo activities continue to be the most sought after. We always want what we can’t have. Yet phone sex allows for people to safely role-play taboo behaviors without engaging in them in real life. You can play with the edges of your sexuality without stepping over the line.
Phone sex also gives you space to reimagine your sexuality. You aren’t in a bed with a person. Rather, you’re on the phone creating a story for both of you to fantasize about. The limits of what is physically possible are gone—and you get to experience new things to understand who you are and what you like.
Finding a Phone Sex Partner
If you’re already partnered up, the task is simple: just ask your mate if they are game to try phone sex. If you don’t have a partner, you can experiment with new people online. Finding a phone sex partner is easy—just make sure that you use a service that verifies the ages of its users.
